34th Detonator [AU!Discedo]

[nameofexorcist]

[Anyone watching television this evening? Well if they are, turning to a certain channel will show Kresnik dressed in this and wearing a straw hat. He's holding a fishing pole in one hand and a dead fish in the other as he stares at the camera/teleprompter filming him. His voice is completely deadpan.]

...For today's recommended fishing area, this region of the lake is... really good for brook trouts. Aren't they... cute little guys... [He holds up the fish to show everyone] Here's a... "fun" fact about the brook trout; it's not actually a trout... but a char.

That's such an... interesting fact. More great facts and... awesome tips after this break...

[There's a commercial break and he is told to smile a bit next time or he'll lose his job. When the break ends, Kresnik is behind a portable BBQ, almost looking like he wanted to jump in the BBQ or go into the lake behind him. But as the camera zooms in on him, he forces a smile. Although, said smile looked incredibly awkward and more of a "I want to punch the cameraman in front of me."]

Now we're grilling our little... friend. It sure smells good. ...I can't wait for our grilled fish to be done. ...Add a little spice over the fish and... ta-da. [His voice sounds even more deadpan at that.] A wonderful grilled masterpiece that's tasty and healthy for you...

I had a lot of fun today... [He twitches but continues on] But now is the end of the show.... tune in next time for more... fishy fun as we venture into the wilderness.

[Later on that evening, Kresnik posts a text message on the network] Don't watch television. If you are, only focus on the topics that are relevant to our duration here.

Comments

[fierybluebird]

[Just. Laughing. So much.]

I don't know mate, what kind of trout that aren't actually trout, but go great with spices is wonderfully informative, eh.

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

[He'll never live this down...]

...Why did you watch that ridiculous program?

[fierybluebird]

Have you seen the news?

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

[He's surprised at the sudden change in topic, but welcomes it]

...Yes, I did.

[rules_the_north]

[Dear Kresnik, you are aware of the fact that your post made him watch TV in the first place?]

Th' fishes are safe?

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

[sob he should have stayed quiet]

...According to the script, yes. Don't waste your time catching any though.

[rules_the_north]

...

'm 'll have t' do something w'th th' boy.

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

Boy? What are you referring to?

[carrythesin.livejournal.com]

[She couldn't help bug giggle.]

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

[Even Kirika watched this. whyyyy]

Kirika... that program wasn't... [Trying to gather the correct words for this]

[carrythesin.livejournal.com]

[And I have mastered spelling. :x WELL... she wasn't planning on it until it was mentioned.]

It was okay, but the news...

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

[sob it's all his own fault]

...Right, I saw the news as well.

[ text ]

[isolatedpiece.livejournal.com]

I'm sure all of us have better things to do than watch irrelevant television. The news, though..

[ text ]

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

Unfortunately, some individuals still watch those programs.

[He isn't sure how much they can say over this network, but...]

Yes, I watched the news as well.

[ text ]

[isolatedpiece.livejournal.com]

Maybe we should get them to doing something useful rather than waste their time in that case.

[ Ange has been having the feeling too, so she's.. trying to work around it. ]

... Seemed like it's quite eventful here lately.

[ text ]

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

It would be beneficial for everyone in the long run.

Yes, with people running away from the authorities and executions taking place.

[kongeriget]

The next episode should be about herring!

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

....

Don't encourage this, Denmark.

[kongeriget]

Why not? Herring's great!

[tag-urdead.livejournal.com]

How strange.

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

[...]

What precisely is strange? [He just... hopes that she isn't referring to a certain fishing show]

[text] forgot to indicate herp

[tag-urdead.livejournal.com]

Your instructions.

[starspangledhero]

HEY WE SAW YOU ON TV! I WAS LIKE "HEY I KNOW THAT GUY" BUT IT DIDN'T REALLY EARN MY ANY COOL POINTS SO TEN I ATE A REALLY HOT PEPPER AND THEN I WAS COOL.

[musicboxsoldier.livejournal.com]

[.............]

America, stop shouting.

[starspangledhero]

YOU MEAN "ALFRED."

AND NO. I REFUSE.